We often focus on tending to the needs of others: our children, our spouse, our parents, our boss, our clients, our friends, our acquaintances, the cashier, the waiter.
We think about past conversations and how we could have said things differently.
We obsess about the one thing we wish we didn’t say in the heat of anger.
We read book after book on how to nurture our children so they grow up to be caring, productive individuals of society.
But we often forget to foster a relationship with the one person who will always be with us, through thick and thin, for better or worse – ourselves.
Who else gets up in the morning and faces all that you face?
Who else reacts exactly the way you do?
Who else is there for you every moment of every day, ready or not?
Who else knows your deepest and darkest secrets and consistently stands by you?
The answer: No-one else. Just you. The ole Me, Myself and I.
Each and every one of us has this special person in our lives.
The one constant person who is with you from the moment you are born to the moment you die.
So, what is your relationship with yourself?
Do you treat yourself well? I don’t mean do you treat yourself to gifts, although that’s important too – sometimes, to a certain degree. I mean do you treat yourself with respect, kindness and forgiveness?
If you wanted to set yourself up for a date with the friend of a friend, how would you describe yourself to the friend’s friend? What words would you use?
What words do you tell yourself when a conversation doesn’t go as smoothly as you had hoped? Be careful. Words can hurt so speak gently.
What are the nicknames that you call yourself? Are they endearing or demeaning?
Who do you see when you look in the mirror? Friend or Foe?
Do you like yourself?
You are going to be with yourself for quite some time so if things aren’t going well, now is the time to change all that.
Go easy on yourself. You’re only human.
Don’t beat yourself up if you screw up – and you will undoubtedly screw up from time to time, likely many times. Everyone does. Instead, learn from your mistakes and pledge to do better the next time.
Be your own best-friend; the kind of friend you are to others.
The better the relationship you have with yourself, the less you will stress over the relationships you have with others because being you, knowing yourself, and doing your best, is all people can expect of you and all that you can expect of yourself.
In your quest to be your own best friend, the first thing on your to-do list should be to give yourself an AWESOME nickname because when you’ve said something stupid to the cute guy you’ve been hoping for months to meet, instead of saying to yourself “Nice one, Dummy.”, wouldn’t “You are one unpredictable gal, Stellar Cosmic Chicana!” feel so much better?
What AWESOME nickname are you going to give yourself?
Share it below.
Embracing Pollyanna 
Oh my word, I love this! That last line is the best – I hope you constantly call yourself that! I’ll give it some more thought but I think mine would be ‘hot stuff’ or ‘rockstar’ or ‘one kick ass cool chica’ ; )
I really connected with all that you wrote – you write so well by the way. I feel like a big part of growing up is growing an understanding rather than just a discomfort at the isolation or alone-ness (i feel theres a difference between this and loneliness) we so often feel in life. Realising we all are in this on our own, as in to a certain extent, shifts the weight of sorrow I think and brings an understanding that we really need to look after ourselves because after all, noone else will and also you feel SO much more empowered and inspired when you do! Big love to you, Stellar Cosmic Chicana!
Why not combine all three? “Hot kick ass cool Rockstar Chica”.
I think you are so right when you said that you feel there is a difference between loneliness and alone-ness. Alone-ness can be great – like you said empowering, and also freeing. I loved your phrase “shifts the weight of sorrow”. Very empowering indeed. Rock on, Chica!
So glad you connected with this and thanks for the compliment!
Stellar Cosmic Chicana out.
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I like this a lot. It reminds me a little bit of Louise Hay’s mirror work, whereby you wake up every morning and look into the mirror and tell yourself all sorts of affirming, complimentary things. Hmm, haven’t done that in awhile!
Great idea. Thanks for sharing!